Aviation's Tailspin

Anybody who reads this column knows how I feel about flying. I loathe it! I would sooner endure an overnight sleeper-car on Amtrak than three hours of turbulence on a Regional Jet. Talking to friends and business associates, I find I am not alone in my dislike of air travel.

The airline business is in a tailspin. Airlines keep cutting air fares to hold market share while also cutting staff pay and, many fear, safety.

Their fleets are smaller and so too are the jets. On routes that used to see 737s you’re lucky to be on a Canadair RJ. And forget about 767’s on transcons. They’re now run with 737’s or A320’s. Empty seats? Not anymore!

Since 9/11 we’ve seen 70,000 jobs lost in the airline business.

On a recent trip to Cincinnati, the guy driving my cab told me he used to be an avionics repairman for Comair before they closed their hub there. He recounted a really sick joke: “What’s the difference between an airline pilot and a pizza? Well, a pizza can feed a family of four.”

Underpaid pilots work up to 14 hours while flight attendants, who make $17,000 a year to start (minimum wage), must endure endless abuse from justifiably outraged customers. But these customer-facing employees shouldn’t be blamed for managements’ decisions. Pilots, mechanics and stews keep seeing pay cuts while the management desk-jockeys give themselves bonuses.

And what happens to the passengers? We’re merely cattle.

Imagine my delight at the recent news that the US Dept of Transportation has fined three airlines $175,000 for last summer’s stranding of a jet filled with passengers, overflowing toilets and screaming babies for six hours on the tarmac after a weather-related diversion.

Continental and operator ExpressJet will ante up $100,000 and, for refusing to allow passengers to offload in Rochester MN, Mesaba Airlines will pay $75,000.
Though these kinds of horror stories of airline indifference seem to occur monthly, this is the first time airlines have been fined. And the Feds say it won’t be the last. But why these paltry fines and not a law?

The proposed Airline Passenger Bill of Rights is still languishing in Congress despite the lobbying efforts of FlyersRights.org organizer Kate Hanni. As she points out, the Geneva Convention grants better treatment to POW’s than the FAA affords human air travelers.

Here’s what the laws are asking for:
1) Essential services onboard: adequate food, water, HVAC and medical kits.

2) The right to deplane if your flight hasn’t taken off three hours after leaving the gate.

3) Creation of an air passenger complaint hotline at the DOT.

We’re not even talking about airlines a la carte pricing for checked bags, blankets and seat selection. Or whacking us with a $30 per ticket holiday surcharge, just because they can. This is basic stuff. Survival.

While waiting on lawmakers to do something for consumers, FlyersRights reminds travelers there are things they can do to protect themselves:

1) If you get bumped because of overbooking and are not offered compensation, protest. Federal law says if you’re delayed by one to four hours you are entitled to $400. For a two to four hour delay, double your ticket price up to $800. Traveling to Europe, up to $900.

2) Pack light so you can carry-on. But always bring three days worth of medicines.

3) If you must check your bags, weigh them at home and don’t trust the airline scales. A recent consumer agency sweep in NYC found 8% of scales tested were inaccurate.

4) Never pack valuables, fragile or electronic items. They may be broken or stolen. And don’t wrap holiday gifts or the TSA will make you unwrap them.

We may never return to the glamorous days of air travel when one dressed up for the flight. But I’d be happy with just a little leg room, a free can of soda and a little consideration when things get delayed. Is that so much to ask?

"I Don't Want To Fly!!!"

You won’t catch me on an airplane anytime soon. Well, maybe for a business trip to Europe (though another crossing on the Queen Mary II would be nice). No, I’m sorry, but the airlines have lost this road warrior as a customer. It’s back to Amtrak, driving or tele-conferencing.

It’s not that I’m afraid of flying. It’s not even the proctological screening by the TSA (though now I hear that cigarette lighters aren’t the terrorist threat we were told they were… but meantime, air cargo still flies unscreened.)

No, it’s the airlines that are at fault. After years of heavy losses, they have down-sized their planes and their service to the point that a trip on Greyhound seems more fun.

This summer is shaping up to be the worst in aviation history. On-time arrivals hover at 68% and are plummeting. Sure, the carriers blame the weather and antiquated FAA equipment, but that’s only part of the problem.

To save money, the airlines fly smaller aircraft, almost guaranteeing a full plane. And schedules are so tight, if there is a delay, forget about finding room on “the next flight.”

When flights are delayed, the horrors begin. You’ve heard the stories… passengers trapped on planes for hours, the AC turned down to save fuel, as planes await their slot for departure. Toilets backing up, no running water, passengers swelter… wouldn’t this be illegal if the cargo were cattle rather than humans?

Flight crews are also at the breaking point. Underpaid to begin with and now vastly over-worked with planes flying 90% full, the flight attendants are starting to crack. On one delayed flight a flight attendant had a mother and her baby ejected because the child kept saying “Bye, bye”. The stew said to the mom, “You’ve got to shut your baby up!” The mother couldn’t, so she and her child waved “bye, bye” to the plane from the terminal. How’s that for “the friendly skies?”

Not that things are much better in first class. Sure, the seats are a bit bigger, but long gone are the days when flying up-front meant a hot meal. On most carriers it’s the same crappy snacks, but in unlimited proportions. Gee, should I go for a third bag of pretzels or try a granola bar?

Access to airline lounges, while still an imperative to get away from the maddening throngs, grows more expensive and less rewarding. In Denver, United saves money by opening only one of its two Red Carpet Clubs meaning a half-mile walk for your free Diet Coke.

Sorry, but the airlines have lost me as a customer. I’ll enjoy an overnight sleeper on Amtrak rather than play on-time roulette at O’Hare. This spring, after being stranded in Charlotte with the promise their “might be” a flight in a day or two, I rented a car and drove home. Twelve straight hours on the interstate beat sitting around that fetid airport with five thousand weary fellow-travelers.

Flying used to be glamorous. Now it’s just tedious.

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JIM CAMERON has been a Darien resident for 15 years. He is Chairman of the Metro-North Commuter Council, a member of the Coastal Corridor TIA and the Darien RTM, but the opinions expressed here are only his own. You can reach him at jim@camcomm.com or www.trainweb.org/ct